Passions Fade I Guess

From David Hume. An Enquiry Concerning Human Understanding

A Miracle is a violation of the laws of nature; and as a firm unalterable experience has established these laws, the proof against a miracle, from the very nature of the fact, is as entire as any argument from experience can possible be imagined. Why is it more than probable, that all men must die; that lead cannot, of itself, remain suspended in the air; that fire consumes wood, and is extinguished by water; unless it be, that these events are found agreeable to the laws of nature, and there is required a violation of these laws, or in other words, a miracle to prevent them? Nothing is esteemed a miracle, if it ever happen in the common course of nature. it is no miracle that a man, seemingly in good health, should die on a sudden: because such a kind of death, though more unusual than any other, has yet been frequently observed to happen. But it is a miracle, that a dead man should come to life; because that has never been observed in any age or country. There must, therefore, be a uniform experience against every miraculous event, otherwise the event would not merit that appellation... The plain consequence is (and it is a general maxim worthy of our attention), 'That no testimony is sufficient to establish a miracle, unless the testimony be of such a kind, that its falsehood would be more miraculous, than the fact, which it endeavours to establish...' When anyone tells me, that he saw a dead man restored to life, I immediately consider with myself, whether is be more probable, that this person should either be deceive or be deceived, or that the fact, which he relates, should really have happened. I weigh the one miracle against the other; and according to the superiority, which I discover, I pronounce my decision, and always reject the greater miracle. If the falsehood of this testimony would be more miraculous, than the event which he relates; then, and not till then, can he pretend to command my belief or opinion.
In the foregoing reasoning we have supposed, that the testimony, upon which a miracle is founded, may possibly amount to an entire proof, and that the falsehood of that testimony would be a real prodigy: But it is easy to shew, that we have been a great deal too liberal in our concession, and that there was never a mirculous even established on so full an evidence.

Hume's sceptical rationalism was a major challenge to religious beliefs throughout the later 18th and 19th centuries and still today I suppose.

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"Indeed, since the credibility of Christianity rests on the Resurrection of Christ (1 Corinthians 15:12-19), the whole orthodox Christian faith crumbles if miracles do not occur. If historical biblical Christianity is to survive and make sense to the modern mind, it is necessary to provide a reasonable explanation of the supernatural. Apart from the Credibility of the biblical account of miracles, we can bid farewell to orthodox Christianity. Such is the challenge before us."
-Norman L. Geisler

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and now me:

I used to get fired up about stuff like that. Reading about David Hume and the effects of his brilliant critiques used to motivate me to want to learn, to want to study, to learn to "philosohize," to know my Bible, to sharpen my wits, to be on my toes. But now... now? Well.. I feel like I've drifted out of the intellectual phase and into simplicity. Perhaps I have gone with the tide from modernity to post modernism. Perhaps I've read too much Marcus Borg.

Maybe Christianity doesn't need miracles. But maybe it does. Maybe Christianity doesn't need history. But maybe it does. I submit that yes, it does. Yes to both of those maybes. But Jesus. May I detach Jesus from Christianity? Just for a second, thank you. Jesus. Does Jesus need history? Does Jesus need the narratives from the greatest Theologians, Matthew, Mark, Luke, and of course John, to be historical reliable and accurate to the T? I submit, no. Perhaps not. Does Jesus need anything? Well, to follow the logic of Jesus being God, a perfect being, then I should think, no, Jesus doesn't need anything. Perfection needs not be changed, therefore needs nothing. Jesus commands, and demands, but needs? No. I do not think I have what would be under the influence of modernity, a mind to go with what Geisler was saying. Upon my arrival to Ozark Christian College, I didn't think much about anything. Within a year or two there, being taught from professors in a very modern academic institution, then yes, my mind was shaped and learned to yield to the demands of modern logic and reason. But now... being set free, which I would say my journey to freedom started a year or two ago, I wonder how important the things that Geisler were saying are. I am not implying that to think as a post modernist is freedom, I am just saying that I began to think outside of the bondage of modernity that was gracefully wrapped around my fragile mind as a young Philosopher/Theologian wanna be.

But where am I now? Obviously I still have a bit in me that yearns to learn and know more about Jesus and great thinkers like David Hume. But not so much. I am much more concerned about me. About me me me me me me. I do not like that. In fact, I hate myself for it. Ironic that my obsession with me has lead me to hate myself. Well, I guess it makes sense, I for one have no problem whatsoever fully adopting the doctrine of total depravity. But all in all, I do not know what I think. I do not know who I am. I do not hate myself terribly, just annoyed at the irresponsibility I display with my intellect.

I suppose the Apostle Paul had the same dilemma, as he displays in Romans 7:14-25, with his psychoanalytical look into his depraved human condition:

"I do not understand what I do. For what I want to do I do not do, but what I hate I do. And if I do what I do not want to do, I agree that the law is good. As it is, it is no longer I myself who do it, but it is the sin living in me. I know that nothing good lives in me, that is, in my sinful nature. For I have the desire to do what is good, but I cannot carry it out. For what I do is not the good I want to do; no, the evil I do not want to do- this I keep doing. Now if I do what I do not want to do, it is no longer I who do it, but it is sin living in me that does it. So I find this law at work: When I want to do good, evil is right there with me. For in my inner being I delight in God's law; but I see another law at work in the members of my body, waging war against the law of my mind and making me prisoner of the law of sin at work within my members. What a wretched man I am! Who will rescue me from this body of death? Thanks be to God- through Jesus Christ our Lord! So then, I myself in my mind am a slave to God's law, but in the sinful nature a slave to the law of sin."
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My passion is for myself. According to the things Paul is saying, my sinful nature is louder than my desire in my mind to delight in God's law. "The acts of the sinful nature are obvious: sexual immorality, impurity and debauchery; idolatry and witchcraft; hatred, discord, jealousy, fits of rage, selfish ambition, dissensions, factions and envy; drunkenness, orgies, and the like. (Gal 5:19-21)"

Throughout Paul's brilliant letters to the churches scattered through Asia, he provides for us a wonderful theology of grace in Jesus Christ given through faith. I'm rusty in my wording, so be patient.

I guess what I am concluding is that I am a sinner, a fickle young and dumb 23 year old who wants to know what to do in life and wants to make money to live a comfortable life, to one day have a wife (ryhme), to play rocknroll music, to enjoy the sun, to get tattoos, i think, and to be a good son, brother, husband, and dad. But through all of that, I am a sinner, and tend to sin quite a bit. And I am given this struggle and stress that I am not good enough to be a Christian because I forsake thoughts and love for Jesus Christ for fantasies or ambitions of my own. What a wretched man I am, who will save me from this body of Death!?

I suppose all I have to do is close my eyes, or look up, raise my hands, or fold them, and believe and accept the grace of Jesus Christ, because I am a sinner saved by a God who died on a Cross and rose and is living today.

... but my passions fade I guess, and I often can't find the strength to do that.